Day 2 of Heavy Update news has hit.
It details the new melee alt for our favorite Russkie: The Killing Gloves of Boxing! If the Heavy punches someone to death while wearing these gloves, he gains five seconds of crit attacks with any of his other weapons. Wow. That’s Heavy.
The page also gives us the names and icons of the Heavy’s 35 achievements, but no further details on them.
62 responses so far ↓
1 Sam // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:33 am
So no downside?
Not impressed
2 J3553 // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:36 am
It’s a slower rate of fire.
3 The Defenestrator // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:36 am
The K.G.B.s attack slower. But I agree, this seems like kind of an upgrade.
4 Christopher // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:36 am
The KGB punch is slower than the regular punch.
5 Sable // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:36 am
If you had clicked on the link (I’m not saying you haven’t, just inferring) you’d see that the Killing Gloves of Boxing swing slower than the Heavy’s default fists. Coupled with his slow movement speed, that is a pretty big downside.
6 Krat // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:37 am
Downside appears to be the same as the Medic’s Übersaw, slower attack speed. That coupled with the Heavy’s already lumbering pace seems like a decent trade-off.
Also, descriptions of the achievements (albeit brief) can be found in the icon filenames.
7 Rory // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:37 am
@1:
Slower swing speed, not to mention that it’s damn near impossible to get melee kills as Heavy in the first place. The more time wasted punchin’, the less time used on shootin’.
8 AlphaHawk // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:41 am
I PREDICTED IT! YES!! AHAHAHA!!!!
9 Sam // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:42 am
I see.
I still don’t think it’s that much of a tradeoff.
10 J3553 // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:43 am
YES!!!
Show Trial is a Taunt Kill!!! (Look at teh file name)
11 AlphaHawk // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:44 am
@ J3:
I threw that in as an idea here too. I bet his shotty will be replaced with a six shooter of some kind. Mark my words. It’ll be just like the pyro’s hadouken taunt.
12 Pixel Knight // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:45 am
Best. Achievement names. Ever.
13 Duke // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:46 am
Some achievement names sound funny (for me as a russian)…
14 J3553 // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:48 am
@AlphaHawk: I know, I thought about it too.
I even posted a comment about it on Pentadact’s site.
15 Duke // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:49 am
Krat, thanks!
now… any ideas what that “uber grind” will be?
16 J3553 // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:51 am
The Supreme Soviet suggests some type of radioactivity… Maybe the bomb cart? (’Cause it’s Atomic)
17 RPharazon // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:53 am
This will be amazing for my Heavy Punching Rampages on 2fort. Nobody treats the map seriously anymore, so I’ll just get the gloves out and abuse the scouts and snipers.
POW
18 The Only Real Stephen // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:54 am
Wow, they really got carried away with the communist revolution names. I love Valve’s clever wordplay.
19 Slade // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:54 am
Here’s a hint : if you want to know what achievements are going to be, click right then Properties of each one ! You will see what an achievement consists of. I like the “Don’t Touch Sandwich”, referred to the “Meet the Scout” movie. Also, the Heavy is really communist ! Lenin, Stalin, Marx… Hell I didn’t see that one coming (looking back… well yes).
20 Duke // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:55 am
Dunno… Kollectivization includes a lot of ammo wasted, how could it connect…
“Don’t Touch Sandvich” is a clear meet the scout reference, but “Konspicuous Konsumption”?! you will be able to actually eat sandwiches ingame?..
21 Niteowl // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:58 am
I was really hoping for an achievement that somehow involved kidnapping intellectuals and scientists and stashing them in some Siberian hell-hole for them to starve slowly to death, their counter-revolutionary ideas forever silenced, their families in constant, tormented grief.
22 MrThompson // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:58 am
A lot of the file names shows what the achievement is, the Supreme Soviet one says something about receiving an uber grind. Some others also mention something about a grind.
23 DoctorDisaster // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:58 am
Also note you have to get a punch KILL, not just a hit, for the bonus.
Grinding I think refers to getting achievements. So an uber grind might be getting an achievement while ubered.
24 PsychoDuck // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:59 am
The description on Konspicuous Konsumption is confusing me… “tf_heavy_eat_sandwiches”?
This can mean only one thing… The new mode involves lots and lots of sandwiches.
The Duck Has Spoken.
25 DoctorDisaster // Aug 13, 2008 at 11:59 am
Oh, and I’m also puzzled by Konspicuous Konsumption. Is the new game mode capture the sandwich?
26 Sam // Aug 13, 2008 at 12:03 pm
Or maybe what loads of people have suggested and you can use a corpse in a sandwich to regain health?
27 iZZY // Aug 13, 2008 at 12:06 pm
So, judging by that single achievement with the “mulleted” Heavy (early version Heavy), are we now going to have the opportunity to customize our characters a little bit?
28 Super Jesus // Aug 13, 2008 at 12:09 pm
Ugh. Apparently from some source, the Heavy unlocks are Boxing Gloves, a sandwich for the shotty that boost health, and a minigun that slows enemies by 50% for a 25% damage removal.
29 Slade // Aug 13, 2008 at 12:10 pm
I don’t think the Mulleted is the Heavy, probably more like the Medic without his spectacles.
30 Bobic // Aug 13, 2008 at 12:22 pm
Wow thanks for the filename info.
31 iZZY // Aug 13, 2008 at 12:27 pm
I don’t know. The faces look quite similar and under properties for Soviet Union, the achievement details say “heavy_assist_heavy_grind” so I’m pretty sure that’s a heavy.
32 PsychoDuck // Aug 13, 2008 at 12:31 pm
@ 28
“Ugh. Apparently from some source, the Heavy unlocks are Boxing Gloves, a sandwich for the shotty that boost health, and a minigun that slows enemies by 50% for a 25% damage removal.”
If that is true, I will be so freaking happy. A goddamned sandwich. Now that’s hardcore.
The Duck Has Spoken.
33 Shane // Aug 13, 2008 at 12:34 pm
I really wish achievements didn’t unlock weapons. It totally gives incentive to grind out the achievements.
I wish they’d do it like they do with Battlefield 2 and start adding up your points at the end of each round.
34 AlphaHawk // Aug 13, 2008 at 12:35 pm
@ J3:
I think it will be a pose I did for Gmod actually. I’m willing to bet that you have to ride the bomb into the final point. :D
35 Nonomu198 // Aug 13, 2008 at 12:36 pm
Not only the gloves have the same downside as a Ubersaw, they also both chrage. Heck, if you use the Kritzkrieg it’s the same thing only you have to wait for your crits. Valve is getting uncreative ;(. How about a FAST meele for the heavy? Since everything is so slow about him, it seems like a sweeter alternative when you are getting a little bored of the old slowpoke.
36 Decay // Aug 13, 2008 at 12:38 pm
I’m very amused that the acronym for the new melee weapon is KGB.
37 AlphaHawk // Aug 13, 2008 at 12:39 pm
I wonder if the heavy will be paying more attention to Sasha, or the medic after this update… Jeleousy :D
http://s278.photobucket.com/albums/kk98/alphahawkp/?action=view¤t=cp_dustbowl0008.jpg
38 Decay // Aug 13, 2008 at 12:40 pm
Wait a second. Boxing gloves. This reminds me of that other video game that has a boxing Russian - Metal Gear Solid 3.
39 Artix // Aug 13, 2008 at 12:47 pm
They’ll probably leave the new gamemode for the last day.
40 J3553 // Aug 13, 2008 at 12:58 pm
@Artix, its got a 50% chance of being a VIP type of thing.
41 Mr. Brit // Aug 13, 2008 at 1:10 pm
why 50%?
42 AlphaHawk // Aug 13, 2008 at 1:12 pm
@ Decay:
Volgin, yes?
And I’m more than willing to bet that the new game mode will be based off the old Hunted with the VIP.
43 Mike // Aug 13, 2008 at 1:13 pm
“Lenin a hand” hahahaha
44 J3553 // Aug 13, 2008 at 1:26 pm
@ Mr. Brit, 50% RCTF.
Really, there’s only like two choices.
VIP or RCTF.
I can’t think of any other gamemode.
45 AlphaHawk // Aug 13, 2008 at 1:34 pm
Hm. Maybe “Elimination”? Maybe it would be a certain player is the “VIP” but doesn’t have the skin. So like, a heavy could be the target in one round, then another player would be the target? Hell I don’t know, I gotta go with J3, Cap the flag or VIP seem to be the most likely….
46 Chijts // Aug 13, 2008 at 1:34 pm
The thing I like about the gloves in their blurb is that you can stack the crit time if you keep using the gloves. But I think it’s gonna be pretty hard to keep on killing with melee as a heavy.
When they release this pack I think my PC might slow down with all the miniguns going off.
47 AlphaHawk // Aug 13, 2008 at 1:45 pm
Maybe we should start thinking of what it will take to get the achievements, to pass time.
I’ll start.
Iron Kurtain: Kill 4 enemies with low health.
Party Loyalty: Don’t know, probably has to do with steam friends
Division of Labor: A medic whom is healing a heavy gets the assist by actually contributing damage.
Red Oktoberfest: Kill a large amount of enemies while ubered.
Show Trial: Kill an enemy with the Heavy’s new insta-kill taunt.
Crime and Punishment: Kill a spy who just sapped a friendly engineer’s building.
Class Struggle: Hard to say, maybe go a certain amount of time without the assistance of a medic?
Soviet Block: Block a certain amount of captures (Basically the “Controlled Burn” achievement that the pyro had)
Stalin the Kart: Obvious, get the cart in a payload map to go backwards.
Supreme Soviet: Not sure, though I’d like to think you ride the bomb in a payload map to the final point.
Factory Worker: No idea.
Soviet Union: Have the same medic heal you for one round.
Own the means of production: Kill a demoman who has stickies already laid down.
Krazy Ivan: Kill an enemy in the water in some way.
Rasputin: No idea, maybe have a high overall kill amount.
Crock Block: No idea, but on a side note, who doesn’t find the name for this one fucking hilarious? :)
Kollectivization: Stand in one spot while firing off the minigun for a certain amount of time, or until a certain amount of ammo is used.
That’s all I feel like doing, comment and whatnot, continue the next side for me someone.
48 Robert64 // Aug 13, 2008 at 1:55 pm
Iron Kurtain: About damage taken by the heavy
Party Loyalty: Defend the medic from near death
Red Oktoberfest: Large amount of heavy - medic assists
Show Trial: Either do “pow” taunt over dead body or taunt kill (hopefully)
Crime and Punishment: Kill people with intel
Class Struggle: Kill another medic - heavy pair
Soviet Block : Two uber heavies block each other
Stalin the Kart: Stand in front of the cart
Supreme Soviet: Get ubers
Factory Worker: Camp near a dispenser
Soviet Union: Two heavies assist each other
0wn the Means of Production: Clear stickies
Krazy Ivan: Underwater kills
Rasputin: Take hits from multiple angles
Icing on the Cake: Kill a nemesis? Or dominate?
Crock Block: Survive a crit rocket
Kollectivization: Assists
Spyalectical Materialism: Find cloaked / Kill disguised spys
Permanent Revolution: Kill another heavy that is spinning his barrel?
Heavy Industry: Fire bullets (probably up to a million)
Communist Mani-Fisto: Crit punch kill
Redistribution of Health: Not sure
Rationing: Kill with shottie
Vanguard Party: First to CP
Pushkin the Kart: Win payload rounds (be at cart)
Marxman: Kill airborne enemies
Gorky Parked: Defend CP
Purge: Kill enemies capping at CP
Lenin A Hand: Revenge assist, a new feature?
Five Second Plan: Kill 5 within seconds after leaving a tele
Photostroika: Freezecam taunt that confirms that Show Trial is a kill with taunt
Konspicuous Konsumption: Eat sandwiches!
Don’t Touch Sandvich: Kill scouts
Borscht Belt: Win a boxing match
49 Rasmus Widengård // Aug 13, 2008 at 1:57 pm
“Lenin a hand”… if it was physically feasible, I would make sweet, ardent love to Valve as a company.
Something tells me my Spy’ll be quite jaded by the end of next week…
50 J3553 // Aug 13, 2008 at 2:06 pm
Show Trial: Destroy someone with the taunt. He’s going to shoot a laser out of his fingers. You walk into the beam? YOU DIE!
And then, in Russian:
Показать судебное разбирательство: Destroy кто-то с taunt. Он собирается стрелять лазером из его пальцев. Вы зайдите в пучок? YOU DIE!
51 Ev // Aug 13, 2008 at 2:58 pm
I hope the Heavy won’t have a taunt kill. Why? It makes no sense. At least the Pyro had the poof of fire that did the kill. But the Heavy only points his finger and says ‘POW.’
52 ClearlynotaRobot // Aug 13, 2008 at 3:23 pm
Fingerpointing IS deadly.
I mean, you could poke someone’s eyes out.
Also, Sammiches? That seems to fit the heavy goals kinda well.
53 Oneperson // Aug 13, 2008 at 3:50 pm
My guess for crock block would be to survive a soldier’s rocket/critrawket at a very close range.
Rationing would be to play through a round using only a certain number of (shotgun) bullets.
Judging from the filename for Marxman, tf_heavy_kill_midair_minigun.png
Probably killing someone in midair with the minigun, maybe?
Rasputin, named for the famous monk, would be to take a certain amount of damage and stay alive (also supported by the filename)
Factory worker would be to get a certain number of kills while standing beside a dispenser (filename)
Permanent Revolution, dunno, since all the filename gives is kill while spun up, which, apart from telling us that you get a kill while spun up (which makes little sense, how could you get a kill with the minigun when not spun up?)
Show trial: POW! Haha!
Heavy Industry: Fire for a certain amount of time (heavy_fire_lots)
Photostroika: Taunt in deathcam picture.
Konspicuous Konsumption: Eat!
Also, A Sandwich would be TOTALLY FURGIN ORESUM.
That is all.
54 Decay // Aug 13, 2008 at 4:38 pm
@ AlphaHawk: Yep, I meant Volgin.
Hrm. Not sure what to think about this sandwich thing.
55 Vince // Aug 13, 2008 at 4:49 pm
Am I the only one who thinks boxing gloves are retarded?
I mean come on, I’d rather get hit by boxing gloves then bare hands, why not give him brass knuckles? Those would hurt more?
56 jordan // Aug 13, 2008 at 5:36 pm
cant wait for that sammich!
57 Tim // Aug 13, 2008 at 6:49 pm
Maybe Crock Block is about saving a teammate by absorbing the impact, although that’d be hard for the engine to track, I’d imagine. Or perhaps the idea is to take the crit rocket next to the soldier and have him die in the splash damage, and maybe it’d also be required that you survive.
58 Chijts // Aug 14, 2008 at 2:53 am
Cool Russian Jesse, I always thought Russian text looks the bees knees
59 gryffinp // Aug 14, 2008 at 7:10 am
This is definitely going to be the most communist update to TF2 ever.
60 AlphaHawk // Aug 14, 2008 at 9:00 am
I think I know what the Spyaletical achievement will require. You’ll need to shoot a disguised spy, not cloaked, and the spy will have to be disguised as a MEDIC for you to get it. Look at the pic, the part in the light is the spy’s bottom half with the pants, but the part not in the light is what I think is undeniably the medic, holding what I guarantee you will be the spy’s replacement for the revolver, that being the silenced pistol from TFC.
61 Adam // Aug 14, 2008 at 2:55 pm
@ Vince:
The boxing gloves would be easier to see than brass knuckles.
62 Still Not Chris // Aug 16, 2008 at 8:47 am
How would he manage this? Either it would take WAY too long to switch to gloves, as Heavy has to put them on, or he somehow fires a shotgun while wearing boxing gloves.
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